The wedding scam: A major cost off any wedding here in the P.I. are the required Videos and photos. The first thing I noticed at the last wedding I attended here in the Philippines, was that the wedding took 30 minutes or so, yet the photos afterward took up to an hour. So using my inquiring mind I set out to solve this Question. I think now I have the answer. At the beginning of the wedding there are two or three guys in your face with a camera, then they disappear. Mister Kodak minuteman, the ringmaster will not allow anyone to leave while he sets up endless groupings for photos. You know, friends of the groom, people who saw the groom one time at the market, Family of the bride, people who know members of the family of the bride, and so on and so on. These endless photos will not end until the 2 or 3 guys who left with their film, are back to sell every person who attended the wedding a picture. Lets hope they gave the Bride and Groom a piece of that action, or at least a discount. When my last Daughter gets married, I'm going to sell the photo rights to the highest bidder, because I'm on to them now! And to Mike who escaped without buying your picture, you are my hero!

The Parking Scam: In 1963 I received my Drivers License, after demonstrating that I could parallel park a 1960 Oldsmobile 98, which I believe is 2 ½ times larger than my Lancer. Yet for some reason, possible my advancing age, I now require assistance parking my car at the public market. This is not a free service, and it's not a service one may decline. I know I tried once, which produced a loud wailing and knashing of teeth. Best advice, give them the Pesos!

The Car Wash: After you've parked at the market, now comes the "Car Wash Crew" ready to wash your already washed and waxed car. Equipped with a bucket of filthy water and rags. "Sir, I wash your car?" I reply, "No thank you it's clean." As they dip into the bucket and move towards the car you must quickly stand in the way and try to translate the word NO into something they can understand. Yet if for some reason you are fond of your car not being clean, let them wash it.